The hardship of losing a loved one cannot be overstated. When you’re grieving a significant loss, you may feel the absence of your loved one throughout the day—in the morning getting ready for work, or at lunchtime when you normally might give them a call. The dinner table is a place where the loss may feel even more palpable, especially at Thanksgiving or another holiday celebration. At Cypress Lawn, our caring staff members help our neighbors in San Francisco and the Bay Area navigate the complexities of grief. If you’re struggling to cope with mealtime without your loved one, here are some grief tips to help you navigate this difficult time.

Set a place at the table.

Setting a place at the table for your loved one can provide peace and comfort during a challenging period of grief. Doing so can help you feel more connected to them and remind you that their presence isn’t forgotten. The table setting can be as simple as an empty chair or a placemat and cutlery. Honoring their presence at the table can help family members feel closer to their absent loved ones.

Give yourself the time you need to grieve.

Remember that grief isn’t linear, and you’re on your own unique healing journey. Forcing a timeline on your grief can produce anxiety and guilt when you don’t feel as healed as you’d like to feel. Try not to judge yourself on how you’re “doing” your grief. You may have assumed you’d be more healed at this time of year, but the holiday season can stir up unexpected waves of grief. Do your best to give yourself grace and understanding.

Join a grief support group.

Meeting with other individuals who are grieving can help you feel understood and supported in your grief. Whether you meet in person or join a regular online gathering, sharing stories and experiences with people who have encountered a similar type of loss can be incredibly healing. You may feel more understood and seen and as a result less alone in your grief.

We recognize that doing everyday things without your loved one requires courage. If you need help coping with grief or wish to access our grief resources, contact our staff.